This fact sheet was created by the Families and Friends of Missing Persons (FFMPU) in New South Wales, malady seek Australia. The FFMPU is a unique service that provides information, view referral and support service for families and friends of the missing. The FFMPU has granted permission to CCIMA to reproduce and post this work.
Over 35,000 people are reported missing each year in Australia. That’s one person every 15 minutes. In NSW alone, around 12,000 people were reported missing during 2011. Fortunately about 99 per cent of those missing persons were located, most within a short time. Sadly, approximately one per cent of missing people remain missing long-term.
Research suggests that for every missing person at least 12 people are affected but this figure may be much higher when you consider work colleagues, school or university friends and acquaintances, neighbours and others in the local or wider community who know the missing person or their family. One person going missing may affect many others. 1
There is no right or wrong way to deal with the disappearance of a loved one. When someone goes missing family and friends will often feel confused and isolated, and initially all their time and energy may be spent on trying to locate their loved one. Family members and friends can experience a wide range of intense emotions including anxiety, worry, panic, anger, frustration, sorrow, regret, shame and embarrassment. All these feelings are normal given the circumstances, but they can be very overwhelming and can result in health problems or isolation from others.
A loved one going missing may also lead to financial difficulties. Whilst it may be very difficult to continue or return to work, the person left behind may have little choice but to do so in order to meet financial commitments. In some circumstances, it may even be necessary to increase work hours.
When someone is missing for a long period, family and friends are left to cope with ongoing ambiguous or unresolved loss. They have to deal with ‘not knowing’ and uncertainty whilst continuing to hope their loved one will be found safe and well. This may be very different to the feelings of grief and loss following the death of a loved one. At the same time, they need to find a way to move forward in their lives with other family members and friends.
Living with a loved one missing affects each person differently. Whatever the effects it is very likely there will be some impact for the person in their work place.
People who have someone missing in their lives may spend a lot of time and energy searching, and also thinking and hypothesizing about how and why the person went missing, where they might be, or what they could have done to prevent them going missing.
Families and friends of missing persons often report experiencing difficulty sleeping, eating and taking care of themselves physically and emotionally. Their physical and emotional health is often negatively impacted.
When a missing person is located this can also mean that your colleague will have a whole new set of issues to face, depending on the circumstances in which the person went missing in the first place and the circumstances in which they’re found. The difficulties they have experienced do not necessarily end with the location of the missing person.
It is often really hard to know how best to help a colleague when you know they are experiencing difficulties, especially as everyone is different. It is also hard when you are trying to be respectful of people’s privacy and wanting to give them space.
How you might help:
Excerpted from the publication “Missing People: A guide for family members and service providers” developed by Families and Friends of Missing Persons Unit, (NSW, Australia).
For further information, please visit www.missingpersons.justice.nsw.gov.au.
Henderson, M. & Henderson, P. (1998) – Issues for the Australian Community, Australian Bureau of Criminal Intelligence, ABCI Publications. ?